Would you light my candle?
Serious inquiries only 🕯️
An image of Angela Bassett in ‘Waiting to Exhale’ cropped in front of a burning building from Twitter
One summer when I was a teenager, the drama camp at my high school presented a show for Rent. Surely it wasn’t the most appropriate choice, especially for a small town like ours, but they really sold it! I must have gone to see the musical at least three times and since my mom was such a big fan of the performing arts she got me the movie on DVD. When most people think about Rent, the “Seasons of Love” song usually comes to mind. The most underrated number is “Light My Candle” though. (I’m still trying to decide who did it better—Rosario Dawson, Tinashe, or Daphne Rubin-Vega.) Sometimes I like to sing it while I’m lighting candles in my apartment. But this isn’t about the song or the play for that matter. This is a story of a candle.
Three years ago, I bought a candle that would change my life for the better. At the time, I didn’t realize that this was the candle… my candle. I was still figuring out my personal scent profile so was very selective about how much I was spending on candles. The first time that I whiffed the candle, I felt a connection. The smell of gardenia, jasmine, black pepper, sweet musk, plumeria, and “a touch of honey” was intoxicating. It wouldn’t be until my third visit to the store that I finally pulled the trigger and purchased the candle. I groaned when it rang up at $42 with tax as I was stingy about paying that much for a 6.5 oz candle that I wasn’t sure would be worth it. The candle would prove to be the collaboration of my wildest dreams.
Reader, I took the candle for granted, not knowing how good I had it until it was gone. If I could go back in time, I would savor that last burn before the wick fizzled out. Of course, it took me wasting time (and money) on a bunch of other candles to realize that this scent had been made specifically for me. No other candle had ever made me feel this way before, it was my everything. This candle knew me before I even knew myself.
I assumed that I would be able to buy a replacement, but when I eventually made my way back to the store however many months later, it was nowhere to be found. When I went on the website to see if there were more online it was sold out. I felt heartbroken. Every once in a while I would think about the candle, check the store’s website, and let out a heavy sigh as “Item out of stock - notify me!” popped on the screen. I repeated this method of self-torture for three years, mentally beating myself up over the one that got away. I just couldn’t believe that I had let it slip through my fingers before I realized what we had. It was special and I had treated it as if it were anything but.
By 2020, I started following the fragrance brand on Instagram with the hopes that they would restock my beloved candle or offer a variation with similar scent notes. After posting about restocking one of their other collaborations, I decided to shoot my shot and send a DM. I essentially gushed about how much I loved and missed my candle, ending the message with “If you ever brought it back I would be eternally grateful :)” More evidence that manifestation is real, whoever runs the account quickly replied “You may be in lucky very very soon.. 🤩” I was so stunned that I couldn’t type straight in response, but for the first time in a while I felt hope. With the confirmation that it was indeed coming back, I carried on patiently waiting. Then on January 7, 2021, my prayers were officially answered when I received a restock email in my inbox. I ordered three of them and while I’m sure that sounds excessive, it’s honestly not enough.
Now that I’m reunited with the candle that sparked my fire I’ve never been happier.